Christmas would be great... if it wasn't for Christmas. Time away at work, some decent seasonal change here, kickass eggnog, and Santa porn. Who doesn't love watchin' santa get the twinkle in his eye?
Anyway, I digress. After spending almost 800$, I'm already feeling my blood pressure go up, as I undoubtedly will receive a "That's it" from a family member, or perhaps the heart-warming "oh, uh thanks." Yea, thought that counts my ass. Family doesn't want gift cards, or presents, they want money. Fucking green, cocaine covered hundred dollar bills.
One of these days I should wrap a hand grenade, with the bow attached to the pin, and just magically find myself in the bathroom when it goes off. Merry Christmas indeed, especially when life insurance pays out.
Bah humbug.
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